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mortimooshcation.
November 19, 2008

I know there’s a lot of you who read this stuff. Big people, little people, people who swear, old people, young people, church people, drunk people, dog people, cat people, important people, even people who don’t stop and say hi when they see me in Costco. (I’m looking at you Jenn.)

I’m never really embarrassed knowing that you know what you know about me.

And trust me, I should be embarrassed.

I recently had an article published in a real! live! magazine! where the journalist got the age of the moosh wrong but BOY HOWDY! did he get the orgasm on the treadmill part right. Oh well. (I did keep it from the tender judgemental eyes of my grandparents however.)

Shortly after my Brazilian experience the moosh announced to my step dad “HEY GUESS WHAT GRAMPA POOPSIE? ALL MY MOM’S HAIR FELL OUT OF HER BUM!”

Unfortunately I am not immune to real live embarrassment at the mercy of a three year old.

Another time the moosh asked my MIL about her panties (because panties are always a topic of discussion with the moosh around.) My MIL told her that she wore the same white panties as I do.

the moosh then proceeded to tell my MIL and FIL that “MY MOM HAS PINK POLKA DOT PANTIES WITH A WHITE PUPPY ON THEM. SHE WEARS THEM A LOT.”

OY.

I think while I’m here in Utah I’ll check in on the hospital where the moosh was born to see if my pride is in the lost and found.

Related posts:

  1. Vacashawha?
  2. Pi Kappa Huggies.
  3. Trots E. Cheese
  4. Tiny Himagramma.
  5. moosh in spanx.

Comments off.

By Lindy on 11.19.08 8:28 pm | Permalink

Ha! Hope your having fun in Utah- even with all the mortimooshcation you’re experiencing.

By JachiCue on 11.19.08 8:47 pm | Permalink

Haha. Kids are honest. Way too honest.

Reminds me of my friend’s daughter saying “Chonies! Chonies, chonies chonies” Followed by our friend Clay asking “What’s chonies?” So she lifter her skirt and showed him. Hee-larious. Well you asked.

Enjoy Utah.

JachiCues last blog post..Whaa?

By Alyson (New England Living) on 11.19.08 9:15 pm | Permalink

Haha Moosh is a character, just like her momma!

Alyson (New England Living)s last blog post..Art-n-Sewl Is Like a Soul Mate (& other cool blogging friends)

By Domestic Extraordinaire on 11.19.08 9:23 pm | Permalink

Love it!

Domestic Extraordinaires last blog post..This is how the Christmas Card rolls….

By DesignHER Momma on 11.19.08 9:30 pm | Permalink

yep, just a week ago read a hardcopy of the article you’re talking about….looks great and you should be proud.

DesignHER Mommas last blog post..who needs a doll when you have a cat?

By midwest mommy on 11.19.08 9:47 pm | Permalink

I love it! Kids are the best.

By Jen on 11.19.08 11:20 pm | Permalink

haha leave it to the moosh to be the one to embarrass you ;) My husband LOVED the ‘my mom’s hair fell out of her butt’ line.

By Kami's Love on 11.19.08 11:32 pm | Permalink

Ahahahahahah! Way funny!

By Rhea on 11.19.08 11:37 pm | Permalink

Hope you’re enjoying your visit in Utah! Your Moosh is hilarious.

My boys were fascinated by tampons for a while. Thank goodness we’ve moved beyond that.

Rheas last blog post..Awesome Giveaways

By kat on 11.20.08 12:14 am | Permalink

I am sooo sorry but I am sitting here giggling my heart out.

Hope your having a faboo time to the great UT!!!!

Tell that great Wasatch front I am soooooo missing it!!!

By Overflowing Brain on 11.20.08 12:15 am | Permalink

I foolishly published my most embarrassing moment (involving accidentally making the motion of a handjob at a fancy dinner) as a guest-post on a blog that gets A LOT more traffic than my own (still wondering how I came to be a guest-blogger there) and I still get people commenting about it.

Why isn’t there someone on the computer to stop me from publishing things like that?

I know my mother is going to come across it someday and drop dead from embarrassment. I don’t even need kids to help me out, I provide endless embarrassment to myself.

Overflowing Brains last blog post..Is it still paranoia if it’s happened before?

By a.men on 11.20.08 12:21 am | Permalink

Very funny! Kids always know how to say things at just the wrong place and time don’t they!

a.mens last blog post..Ramblings of a Scattered Mind

By Andrea in IN on 11.20.08 1:18 am | Permalink

hahaha – that’s freakin’ hilarious! There are no secrets with children around…

By Meg on 11.20.08 1:47 am | Permalink

Ha, love it!

Megs last blog post..These Days

By Julie Y. on 11.20.08 1:50 am | Permalink

Thanks for the hearty laugh out loud kind of laugh. If you find your pride let me know. I think I lost mine with child #1. It’s still MIA.

Julie Y.s last blog post..Things I Have Done…Tagged

By ali on 11.20.08 10:07 am | Permalink

i love that she says bum. it’s so very canadian ;)

alis last blog post..more than a one-armed paper hanger

By Emily the Utah transplant from the Midwest on 11.20.08 11:21 am | Permalink

And THIS is why I will never be nekkid around my children (when I have them!!)

Emily the Utah transplant from the Midwests last blog post..Something’s in the Water and Some Things on My Mind

By threeundertwo on 11.20.08 12:38 pm | Permalink

Whoa, looks like I need to go read some more of your old posts!

threeundertwos last blog post..Vintage Thingies Thursday: Baby It’s Cold Outside!

By michelle on 11.20.08 1:05 pm | Permalink

You are very brave. I am glad you share so much with us… I feel that I know you well enough to acknowledge you in Costco!

P.S. It is cold here – stay in California.

By Amy on 11.20.08 2:23 pm | Permalink

You can check, but it won’t be there.

Once when my daughter was 4 she told a male acquaintence of mine, a guy I had a class with, that “Mommy is wearing her pretty pink underwear today.”

There is nothing you can say – just nothing will make a smooth transistion out of that place. I still die a little thinking about it.

Amys last blog post..Monkeys and Bears Need Cages

By Jenn on 11.20.08 4:26 pm | Permalink

Well I hope you’re not talking about ME Jenn, because I don’t have a Costco membership. But if I did, and I saw you, I’d probably squeal and drop my 40-gallon jar of pickles.

Jenns last blog post..5 Friends.

By Jenn on 11.20.08 4:27 pm | Permalink

PS, I’m glad you said “drunk people” because now I know I’m not alone in this.

By Ket on 11.20.08 4:45 pm | Permalink

I saw that article in IM and thought — “HEY! I read that blog. I must be pretty hip if it’s in a magazine.”

Then I realized that hip people don’t use the word “hip” and the buzz was killed.

Hope you’re enjoying your travels. IN remains cold and grey, but I prefer that to hot & humid.

Kets last blog post..It’s a small world after all (with apologies to my Disnophile friends)

By Tara on 11.20.08 5:11 pm | Permalink

haha i can only imagine

By Tara on 11.20.08 5:13 pm | Permalink

wow…don’t know what went wrong with my comment there…

i can only imagine what she’ll be like as a teenager!

and seriously…you’re in utah, i’m in utah…i would love to meet you.

By Domestic Goddess (In Training) on 11.20.08 5:34 pm | Permalink

That is great… my son (2) answered the phone today while I was in the shower and promptly told the caller that I was going “poopy in the potty.” Humiliating and untrue. I was just in the shower!!!!

Domestic Goddess (In Training)s last blog post..Eight Year Old Murderer???

By Rachel on 11.20.08 5:35 pm | Permalink

what part of Utah are you in? I also live in Utah.

Rachels last blog post..Pictures…

By Maggie on 11.20.08 5:48 pm | Permalink

Haha no pride in the lost and found at any hospital I’ve heard of! When I was in the hospital for 3 days just about 1 year ago, my aunt (who worked for years at Mass General in Boston and knows a thing or two about hospitals!) told me when you go to the hospital, check your pride & dignity at the door! And then, well, you’re never quite the same…

By Becky on 11.20.08 6:12 pm | Permalink

Hey, welcome back to Zion friend. I hope you have a great stay!

And, yeah, kids just say the best things. No way to keep a secret when kids are around. They just do that.

Happy thanksgiving next week.

By kate on 11.20.08 11:13 pm | Permalink

Well leave it to a kid to embarrass ya!

I blogged forever and my family and friends read so I finally gave up on it and moved to a new location. I kinda like not everyone I know reading me because I did find myself explaining myself more than I wanted.

By Mad Woman on 11.21.08 2:16 am | Permalink

You’ll find Pride filed next to Dignity in the records room. Head down the hallway past Mortification and Humility, turn left at the corner that houses Embarrassment and you’ll find yourself standing in front of a locked cupboard holding the Pride & Dignity that belongs to every mother out there.

Let me know if you find mine!

Mad Womans last blog post..Motel Mayhem – Starring……..

By staciesmadness on 11.21.08 5:33 pm | Permalink

hahah. Kids!

By Kim on 11.22.08 2:35 am | Permalink

SO hilarimous. Which mag was this? I don’t think I knew about this?

Kims last blog post..Tender Mercies

By leslie on 11.22.08 5:09 am | Permalink

oh how true:) gotta love those kiddos! been there!

leslies last blog post..Veterns Day

By JudgeNot on 11.25.08 10:25 am | Permalink

double oy.

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